viernes, 10 de enero de 2014

Aitor Molina vs. Seahorse Seashell Party (English version)

Aitor Molina vs. Seahorse Seashell Party #002... por aitormolina

Egun on guztioi*, Aitor Molina talking to you. You know? I love, love and absolutly love the godamn Spider-man. But this time we aren't going to talk about him, we will cover Family Guy, translated as "Padre de Familia" (Father of Family) in the hispanic countries.

*Egun on guztioi: "Hello everybody" in Vasque.

Yes, I know that not everybody likes this show and it started as a cheap Simpsons copycat. With the pasing of years, the yellow family has lost too much fun and original characteristics until making totally stupid episodes without heart. But the Griffins had offered year after year new eps (episodes) which, sincerely, get better each season. Even its creator, Seth MacFarlane, has earned some privileges on television about what can be shown in a cartoon. That has only happened before with South Park.

I could spend hours talking about how this three series (Simpsons, Family Guy and South Park) had inspired me, but I want to review a single ep in this video: Seahorse Seashell Party. What does this ep have on special? In my opinion, it's one of the finest yet. And what better way to introduce this cartoon with a good ep? Which is a crossover with the other two MacFarlane shows: Cleveland Show and American Dad.

I suppose that you have watched Nostalgia Skapokon's review about The Hurricane where he tells clearly his point: if you don't know beforehand, you won't notice that's a crossover. I don't want to repeat things he said, but I have to confirm that even being a good ep, it doesn't well as a crossover. So let's don't wait any longer to watch the ep.

AM: Since this is the most forced crossover on the universe, I will call a friend to help me.

L: Hi, I'm Lugosi and I've been bribed to criticize this Family Guy ep that starts, obviously, with the intro.

(The Griffins are watching the news, where they say that a tornado will arrive. The TV signal goes and Peter says he wanted to see G.I. José, which is showed in a flashback)

L: What the heck, a G.I. Joe parody?

AM: Oh, I forgot this is FG, so the jokes will be told in flashbacks. They will cut the scene to show other that has nothing to do and they hope we will laugh at that,

L: You have to make a reference to serve as a transition to play the next scene.

AM: Ok... so... this is like... when I ate... fruit for the first time?

(AM eating strawberries)

L: Perfect.

(Brian is hiding mushrooms and he speaks)

L: Wait a minute, the dog and the baby can speak?

AM: Yes, is a thing in the series.

L: I didn't know about these hallucinogen mushrooms. Did you?

AM: Yes, I knew about them... I learnt it by the hard way.

(Vietnam flashback to a death by a mushroom playing Gunshot Awakening)

-I need some life, I need some luck, let's see if I'm lucky, a bit of life, I want that people... a mush... AAAH... I WAS KILLED BY A MUSHROOM... HOW COULD I BE KILLED BY A MUSHROOM... WHAT THE HELL... WHAT'S THIS? A MUSH...

(The Griffins decide to play a game of guessing movies)

L: Yes!

AM: Yesssss!

(Peter shows a movie)

L: The Room!

(Other movie)

AM: Wall-e!

(A strange one with Indian music)

L: Pesadillas del Infierno (Nightmares of Hell)!

AM: Wait a moment, PDI has a movie?

L: Yes, but it was made before the series.

AM: Now I know what will I review the next time.

(After the game, Peter starts making "dad sounds")

L: Eh... ok... what type of jokes are these?

AM: Oh, these, my villanous looking friend, is a bit of "Macfarlenian" humor.

L: What?

AM: Seth is often critiziced because he thinks that making some stupid joke longer will be funnier.

L: Oh, now I get it, like that long and boring scene from Inglorious Basterds.

AM: That's right!

L: So Brian starts hallucinating.

AM: That or he is turning into the Tomelloso Seducer.

L: And now they play finger-shooting.

AM: What amuses me of this joke is that it appears in other ep with different consequences.

(A mime shoots another killing him)

L: Why do they hate the daughter?

AM: Well... let's say that Meg isn't precisely the most popular character, so she's degrade to punching bag throught the seasons.

L: Is that funny?

AM: No, but look, Brian is going to cut his ear!

(He does scaring Lugosi)

L: Oh my God, who can be so demented to enjoy this?

AM: Ok, there you have a Lady Gaga joke.

L: Not fucking fun, is any funny picking on a person just because it's famous?

AM: No... no.

("Epic Gamer meets Thous Carapollen", a YouTubePoop made by AM where a famous Spanish youtuber kicks a fangirl for entertainment purposes)

Epic Gamer: And she falls...

L: Did you insert a clip where you pick on a Spanish celebrity?

AM: Eh... yesh...?

L: But how..? An adult flying-kicks a girl and you laugh at that?

AM: It's violence, violence is fun!

L: I will tell you a story with a violent plot as base.

Once upon a time, there was a Japanese girl called Madotsuki. She liked videogames and violent series, so one day, she took a knife and killed her parents.

L: Tell me, still funny?

AM: I think you're taking this series too seriously.

L: Do you know what? I will show you wrong, I'm here in a moment.

AM: Ok. So Brian starts hallucinating more... confunding Stewie with the Annoying Orange.

AM: Sure... now that Brian is losing his head, we retuuurn to the boring Griffin family.

-And yes, we have another long stupid unnecessary joke that makes no sense and wouldn't lose any fun making it shorter.

-This is not funny to watch, it only makes me wonder how is the Doctor Pandemia spending his time on the Motsukora manga festival.

(Pandemia singing Skyfall)

AM: Poor Meg, I'm feeling sorrier for her than for Euristeus.

(The Griffins dress as aristocrats)

AM: Ohohoh, snob joke!

AM: And now... welcome to the panic dimension, where your biggest nightmares get real, this is by far the best part of the ep, which references Nightmare before Christmas and Evil Dead.

(AM screams after the jumpscare)

AM: So... after... (BRIAN)

AM: FUCK, is there any baby scarier than... (MAMA)

L: I'm back... Aitor?

AM: (traumatized)

L: I suspected it, so much drug, violence and anarchy did you bad.

AM: No, nothing important, it's my fear to the mushroom, I can't take it!

L: Now... is time to defeat your fears... take one of this.

AM: What? Are you crazy? See what happened when touched one, imagine if I had eaten it.

L: Aitor, what killed you wasn't the mushroom, but the surprise. Believe in me or you will be showing that this series suck.

AM: No, Seth MacFarlane has his flaws, but every showrunner have... even me. If I have to hallucinate and suffer to defend my thesis so the show can go on... I will take it.

(Epic hallucination scene)

L: Dr. Pandemia, I got rid of the critic.

Dr.P: Awesome, awesome, there's only a small problem.

L: What?

Dr.P: Do you remember that this was going to be a crossover ep? Let's say that Aitor invited a person who will arrive soon.

L: Nostalgia Skapokon? That's impossible, a hurricane took him.

Dr.P: I mean the Lord of Night, the Dark Knight, the Bat-man...

L: Are you talking about...?

Dr.P: Yes, Cameron Lawson.

P: Who?

Dr.P: Texas Batman!

(There's no point on subtitling what Cameron says since it's in English)

L: Oh, English, fuck, I can't speak it well.

*Look the subtitles*

L: Oh, I see, I'm Lugosi, Aitor is on a trip.

L: So Meg faces her family giving them their own medicine.

L: Yeah, another meaningless joke. Better to continue...

Chorus: Texas Batman just said that! Take it to your home!

L: Now the argument gets intense. I'm not going to cut Meg's monologue because it's a great character exposition and it would develope the series if she actually had chenged after this ep.

L: We will cut the rest not to spoil the ep, I will only tell that all the family gets into.

L: Why? Meg discovered how important she is for the family.

L: Now that you say that, makes sense, but it's only a cartoon, it hasn't any improtance.

L: Wow, you're smart.

L: Finally, Pandemia, Cameron has left and Aitor is still knocked.

Dr.P: Perfect, we can finally put this plan together. When I can escape from this horrible manga convention, I will go there and take the cells I need for the clon. But finish the review, it's not good leaving it unfinshed.

L: Ok, I will end this rubbish.

L: That on real live would be...

-You are a fucking bitch!

L: And to overkill the stupidity, Stewie makes a drug PSA.

L: This shit makes me want to drug myself! What type of cartoon mixs cheap insults, graphical violcence, nudity and eternal jokes to make people laugh? And that pro-harassment message at the end... is the worst lesson I had ever heard! What's worse, MacFarle has another two series with this ep's plot, and they don't look better. You can watch Best Hercules or another Gaiam, Pure Magic, product before this antimoral hallucination.

L: Make me a favour and run away from this shit like it was a palgue.

L: Lugosi had talken to you, the new Dr. Pandemia henchwoman, last one has died by a brain tumor... and the boar is in Mars.

-Will Skapokon be able to survive the hurricane?

-Will Aitor take his mushroom fear or die trying it?

-Will Voltiok be able to finish his part of the crossover?

-Will Pandemia escape from the manga convention?

(After the credits)

Matias the Red Robot says, visit BRIAN!

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